Monday, January 24, 2011

New beginings

So since moving to the farm we have no internet. Now granted we could get a landline for the purpose of dial up but between the land line that would never be used as we aren't much on talking on the phone and the price of dial up we'd be paying for dino slow dial up what we'd pay for wifi. So we are waiting it out in hopes that Comcast will find us and deliver us from our dead zone. In the mean time I have a new Iphone that will allow me to blog. It will also allow me to write insane words I did not type because the Iphone thinks its so smart and corrects everything I type. I have never seen the word Hebraic so much in my life. (my finger hits b instead of space frequently and the phrase he says becomes Hebraic)

So that is the reason for my long absence (as if anyone reads this). The tranquility of farm life brings with it electronic isolation.

In the meantime we have of course moved into our house which is wonderful!

More importantly we had our third beautiful daughter Layla Grace.

Her birth experience was amazing as I chose Natural child birth even with back labor. I highly recommend it. Epidurals are overrated. The pain is exaggerated in most cases by over dramatic people. I assure you, what you have in your mind is far worse than reality. Its amazing, exhilirating and empowering and for this mommy who had a miserable pregnancy, it made me want another baby! That is an issue for later pondering...who knows...

Layla is by far our easiest baby. At four months already I cannot believe how shes grown already. She sleeps pretty well through the night and is such a smiling joy. She rarely cries though when she does you know she wants whatever it is immediately. She is beautiful with red hair as I knew she'd have and beautiful blue eyes. We are so blessed.

Throughout the pregnancy Ella kept saying she was the baby . I m your baby mama. I couldn't even sing lullabies that referred to little girls. Upon entering my hospital room and seeing her baby sister's face for the first time she declared "Im a big girl now mama because I am her big sister" I cried. Already emotional and exhausted I found the moment both beautiful and heart breaking because even though I had a new baby I wasn't ready for Ella to be a big girl. I'm still not.

Its been a rough road adjusting for all of us. Ella still needs so much and a new baby needs so much and Tony's work schedule is unforgiving. Through the chaos we've learned a new normal. I love to stay home and am quite content not to leave the house. The hassle of bundling and corralling everyone to the car proves to outweigh the benefits of an outing alone with three children. Besides between baby feedings, diaperings and the many needs of the other two our days fly by much too quickly anyway.

Have I mentioned I love my life? I can't imagine anything better (or more stressful) than being home with my girls day in and day out. So many in our country define success on monetary rewards or career advancement, but what does that gain you? I know some can't stay home but I've found the true definition for me is the smiles on my girls faces and my being there to see them all.

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